He's probably already been cheating and this is his way to assuage his guilt about it. She could ask him, Did you do it? And really try to find out. If she wants to cheat, she could also ask for a "hall pass" as well. But not everyone wants to. I've been married for 8 years and although I've had a number of hard times with my husband because of his health, being super stable and super committed is what we both value and health issues could happen to anyone including me.

If my husband asked for a "hall pass," and he seemed to be cheating or would be cheating, it would be a betrayal of the core foundations of our relationship and I would divorce. Now about my husband. This guy actually thinks cheating is a type of abuse and compares it to the listed forms of spousal abuse in its emotional effects. He's a philosophy PhD and wants to write about this. So I highly doubt he would.

Ideally, there should have been an extensive discussion about fidelity and what commitment means to each partner, as the commitment is being made. Some people just assume their partners won't cheat, or they themselves won't cheat, and are surprised when it happens. One needs to look at the future, at the beginning.

Spouses may also use financial dependency or other types of dependency to entrap one another, and then abuse their power. The ideal is if each partner is essential to the other. Then the relationship is strong and the power dynamic is balanced.